How[L] You Doin'?

Just when you thought it couldn't get any better.  Just when you thought I ran out of ideas.  Turns out my friend loves owls.  Turns out that I love baking.  Let's do some math.

Friend loves owls + I love baking + It's her birthday = 

I wish I was kidding. But for the first time in my life (okay, not really but I want this to be dramatic) I decided to decorate cupcakes.  Not bad for the first time, eh?  I think it's pretty good.  And like most things, and 80s movies, I got by with a little help from my friends.  They helped me accomplish these bad boys in less than an hour, so mad props yo.  Thanks a ton to those who helped me out.

Want to make these? Not sure how to create something only worthy for Poseidon (and maybe Dionysus, if he's really really nice to you)?  I guess I'll tell you.  But ONLY if you promise to make them beautiful and think of me the entire time.  Then again, why would you ever be thinking of something/someone else?  That's beyond my realm of understanding.  

"Wine for cupcakes, Eve? Seems like a fair trade to me...look into my eyes." -Dionysus

Here we go.

If you're planning on making owl cupcakes, you're going to need some cupcakes.  If that didn't occur to you, please go enroll in your nearest elementary school.  Please and thank you.  Make the cupcakes in whichever flavor you desire, my friend happened to love chocolate so that's what I made. Ya dig?

Once those puppies are made, whip up some vanilla buttercream frosting really fast.  Don't know how to make buttercream frosting? Shame on you.  Alas, I'm only here to teach.  Take some softened butter, mash it up, add confectioner's sugar and vanilla to taste. SHAZAM. Buttercream frosting.  Beware. If you use granulated sugar, you're going to have frosting that will make you bleed. Literally, it's going to be so gritty that it will shred your esophagus.  And I'm going to take a conservative guess and say that 99% of the world's population wants an esophagus that's intact.

Once everything is settled, the first thing you're going to want to do is grab some of those mini Oreos you're shoving in your mouth right now (I see you) and split them in half.  See the cookie with the filling left on it?  Can you see a little ol' eye?  I can.    

How about now? Yes?

Remember that frosting you just made? Ugh, did you eat it all? Again? Make some more. This time, put some in a small pastry bag.  Snip off the end, the very very end, so you have a little outlet for the frosting to be piped out of.  Squeeze some out and put M&Ms on the frosting.  

Do you see eyes now?  

How about now? If you don't, let me make it a little more clear.  I guess I'll put it on the frosted cupcake, just for you.

If you can't see eyes now, please go to your nearest ophthalmologist.  Now that the eyes are in place, next comes the nose.  And I considered taking the easy route and making them beakless, but I decided not to make all of these owls face the same fate as Michael Jackson.  So, instead of making them noseless, I found some Neccos and stomped the yard on them, just a little bit.  They happened to break into the perfect beak shapes.  You call it destiny, I call it dancin' skillz.

So I guess at this point, you could be done.  But what owl looks like this? Hopefully none, because that's kind of ugly.  So, take some of that black decorating gel you happen to have in your cupboard and make some little v's.  The idea is to look like little feather ruffles.  Observe:

A little cuter? I think so.  To top it off, get some slivered almonds and make little wings out of them.  Just put three or four on both sides of that little owl.  Prepare to turn into a six year old girl who just pet a puppy.  You'll squeal just like that.  I promise you.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

We even had fun with it and made a few evil ones.  Or tried.  The gel wasn't cooperating as much as we would have liked.  It just turned into a unibrow.

Caveman owl?

They were a huge hit, and you have to admit they're pretty damn cute.  The best part about them is that they're a lot of fun to decorate, and if you get a friend or two to help you out it goes by really fast.  I think my friend died just a little when she saw them, everyone at her birthday party thought they were too cute to eat.  Oh but trust me, they're not too cute to eat.  Because you should know by now that not only do I make things look nice (see photos above) but I make them taste delicious too.  So, if you have a friend that loves owls, you can't go wrong with these. 

 "This I promise youuuuuuuuuuuuu." -N*SYNC

Reflections

Guess what, kids? It's finally summertime. This means that I'll probably be back to blogging one or twice a week, because I'll have nothing better to do with my life.  This also means no more schoolwork until August.

Praise Jesus.
[via turnbacktogod]

As I was packing up my room into boxes, I couldn't help but think about what this year was all about. I was thinking about the past and future all at the same time.  My sophomore year of college was pretty ballin' and I think this summer will be great too.  So, what happened since my last post (in March, sorry about that)?  I'm pretty sure that I made 25 ladies fall in love with me.  I was their RA and at the end of the semester, they baked me cookies to thank me for everything I did for them.  I'm always the one that bakes stuff, I forgot how it feels to be on the receiving end of that.  I think my heart actually melted a little, I was really touched.  I'm glad to have impacted their lives, just a little bit.  Okay, enough with the emotional mumbo jumbo.

As far as actual schoolwork goes, this semester only proved one thing to me.  I'm about to give you some damn good advice right now.  This is something you need to tell your grandchildren when you're sitting around in a circle, knitting on Christmas Eve.  Pretty intense, right? Well this advice is intense.

You ready?

You sure?

100% sure?

Sigh. Alright.

When you're in college and you're registering for classes: Never, under any circumstances, register for six science classes, laugh, say you'll be fine, and then go on with your day.


Never.


Because guess what. You won't be fine.  You'll actually die a little.  I was a fun-loving soul before I committed the masochistic schedule that was my spring semester.  Now I'm hollow and empty on the inside, like one of those Russian dolls.

I even dress the same way now.
[via theworldstore.wordpress.com]

If you're ever considering doing that, please learn from my terrible mistakes.  You don't have to ever do that to yourself.  The apocalypse seemed to be a better fate sometimes.  I made it through.  And maybe I was being a tad dramatic, I still love having fun.  I mean, throw a water slide in front of me and I turn into that kid who just got his first bicycle for his fifth birthday.

"I want to go to there" -Liz Lemon
[via hubpages]

This semester did open my eyes to a lot of new things.  I learned firsthand that fracking will probably ruin more than it's worth.  Props to the fathead minnows I did research on.  I also learned that Ithaca is one of the weirdest towns in America.  I had an internship that required me to go to people's homes and collect tap water for testing.  Let me tell you something about these people: some of the town folks I've talked to are more strange than hotpants guy and the Commons Magician.  Ithacans, you know what I'm talking about.  For those who don't, let's just say there are strange people that inhabit this planet with us.  And lots of purple scarves.  I learned how to form a circuit board and gained respect for people that build computers (not my thing, sorry computer geeks).  I learned how light travels, how we see, hear, and process all of that.  I learned how to treat about 50 types of illness, and how to spot them by just looking at someone.  I learned about every renewable and nonrenewable resource out there, which ones work and which ones aren't worth our time.  I have a good grasp on what I want my future home to look like (trust me, it's going to be incredible).  You're invited over anytime.  I'll cook for you.

But that's all over now.  This semester is done.  I said goodbye to the multitudes of friends I made this year (most of them international students who I may never see again in person) and set off for home.  Now I look to the summer.

If only. Dream summer/life right here, kids.
[via gentogenym]

Back to the 40-hour work week.  Back to the gym (egads).  Back to weekend adventures.  Back to Bonnaroo.  Wait, what? Bonnaroo. Oh yes.

I said it.

I'm going to Bonnaroo.  Unfamiliar with it? Let me explain it for you.  Me and 79,999 other people are heading over to Tennessee for a few days in two weeks to jam out to music, have fun, and go swimming.  I'm excited.  I'm going with a three really good friends.  I feel like at the end of it, we're either going to love each other so much after spending four days straight with each other, or be the complete opposite.  It'll be love or hate.  I hope it's love.  I'll be bringing sunscreen.  I won't be bringing shampoo though.  I'm not planning on showering much.  It'll be the worst part of it.  Camping out in a tent, going to as many shows as you can handle, eating peanut butter...what's not to love?

Each one of those specks? A tent. Can't wait.
[via ampmagazine]