Some Confessions.

So this Thursday, the vampires called me.

No silly, the REAL ones!
[via Cracked.com]

"Um, hello I'd like to speak to Evelyn please?"
"This is she."
"Oh! Goodness! Hello Evelyn, it's [fill in generic woman's name here] from the American Red Cross! Our records show that you haven't given blood in quite some time! Would you care to give us another pint of your delicious blood?"
"Oh, well yeah, I guess. I mean, I haven't donated in a while...so sure."
"How excellent! How does 8am on Saturday work for you? I have appointments open then!"
"I can do 8:30..."
"Phenomenal! [I swear to God I heard lips smacking hungrily at this point] Well thanks so much Evelyn! See you on Saturday!"
"Okay...well see you then.  Have a nice day..."


Those pesky vampires called and they roped me into their lair and sucked a pint out of me.  I'm a sucker for philanthropy.  Haha, sucker? Get it? I crack myself up...


So yeah, this is how my weekend started off - by losing a pint of blood to save three lives.  I really love giving blood, mostly because I get as many Lornadoones as I want without being judged.  

The perfect remedy to any crisis.
[via Almostvegan]

So I walk into the Red Cross, thinking it would look like all of the other blood drives I've been to...covered with little tents and people scurrying everywhere.  


Oh how I was wrong.  The American Red Cross looks like a damn palace.  I'm talking fancy leather chairs, plasma screens, classy-ass donor bed/chair things that are more comfortable than my mattress at home, a fridge completely stocked with juice...I can't even begin to describe my surprise.


Seriously, I'm going to give my blood just to sit in those chairs.  And for people that give platelets or double red cells (or anything that takes longer than usual), they sit you in chairs with plasma screen TVs individually hooked up to the chair.  Oh good lord.  I'm going to go to the Red Cross, figure out what takes the longest to give, GIVE THE BLOOD, put on a Snuggie and pop in Hercules on my custom plasma three feet from my face.

This is one of the best Disney movies of all time.  Go away if you disagree.
[via Glogster]

And then I would promptly stuff my face with Lornadoones and apple juice.  No regrets.  And no mercy on those Lornadoones.  Those things are going DOWN.


But another awesome thing about giving blood is that you're so tired, naps are required.  Don't get me wrong, I'm the kind of lady that can nap pretty much anytime and anywhere.  But I think I got a collective 16 hours over the course of the day.  And now I feel so awake and just ready to tackle anything.  Perhaps I'll give blood before finals week next semester...hmmmm.


So blood giving and sleeping was all I did yesterday.  Sometimes, you just have to sleep for 16 hours, it's okay it happens to everyone.

Towel-puppy hybrids need to sleep, too.
[via Stumbleupon]

But today was a different animal.  My alarm went off at 6am, I was in the shower by 6:30 and I hated my life. I was yet again volunteering.  But this time, it was to back up my damn sister, who needed an adult to volunteer with her to get community service hours.  I swear, sometimes she does this stuff to seek revenge.  I know I could've rejected her and not volunteered, but then I would've felt guilty.

So I'm stuck in this philanthropic mess I've created for myself.  And my sister is reaping all the benefits.

I think she had this look on her face...
[via Smosh]

Anyway, we're at this place at 8:00 in the morning and I find out that I'm running this game for kids to play.  Awesome! I love kids, this is going to be fine!

I don't think anyone has the capability to love some of the children I worked with today.


Guys...I'm a nice person, I really am.  I promise.  And maybe it's the way I was raised, but I don't think some of these kids should've helped themselves to the prizes I was giving away when they already have nine, while the person in line behind them doesn't have any.  What happened to mutual kid respect? Is cutting in line cool?  Is cheating at ball toss games something hip and groovy?  Maybe, I'm behind on the times or something, but even the parents were doing it...

I just don't like it when parents play games that are meant for children and deprive the kids of prizes that are rightfully theirs, and I don't really appreciate children that take forty prizes when you've got others who have none...but I'm finished with my parenting rant.  Alas.

So yeah, I dealt with some people whom I don't quite agree with.  On top of that, I felt like I would chunder at any given moment, so my Sunday was shot.

Really kid? REALLY? You already have nine bubble necklaces, you cannot have another one.  Sorry for the inconvenience.  Now please lower your finger.
[via dontwatchthat]

But after the hellish carnival I endured, my day did get brighter.

I went and saw a movie, the new X-Men movie in fact.

I went and saw the new X-Men movie all alone and I'm not ashamed.  


I really wanted to go see it, and it was pretty impromptu.  First of all the movie was EFFING AWESOME.  Go see it immediately.  I loved it.  I might go see it again all by my lonesome again.  It's whatever.  Don't judge me.



Eve's Movie Theater Rules
1. Always bring a jacket or hoodie.  It makes so much sense that the most logical time to blast the air conditioning is when everybody sitting in a room is sessile for two hours.  With no movement means no body heat, which basically translates into Eve over here becoming a human popsicle.  I always bring a zip-up because I ALWAYS get cold.  And I know I'm not alone...don't be ashamed.

2. Never get a drink that will overfill a smallish-sized balloon.  Why? Because that's basically the size of your bladder when expanded and filled.  If you're like me, you hate going to the bathroom during the middle of a movie.  You can't pause the movie in a theater. Oh the horror!  So go for a small or medium...because you can always get more afterwards.

3. Turn off your damn phone.  This is another pet peeve of mine...I mean check your phone all you want before the movie starts, but once the lights are off, please show some respect for the people around you and don't check your phone.  People can live without you for two hours.

4. ALWAYS ride the rollercoaster. ALWAYS.  This one's self-explanatory.

OH HELL YES.
[via Tumblr]

But seriously, X-Men rocked.  This summer has so many awesome movies coming out.  Transformers, Green Lantern, Planet of the Apes.  The preteen boy in me is flipping right now.  Hell, the entire entity that is me is flipping right now.

The Hugh Jackman cameo in the movie made my life.  True life: I'm in love with Hugh Jackman.  ALMOST as much as I'm in love with George Washington.

What a hunk.
[via visitdc]

And I love Hugh just about as much as I love Miss Emma Stone.  This is my major confession right now, people.  I would unabashedly marry Emma Stone.  I'm not really sure how I got to this topic, but whatever.  Anywho, I picture a future where we are married and our adopted children are running on our awesome playground in our awesome future house.  Oh dreams.  If only...

I mean, COME ON.
[via screencrave]

That's pretty much it.  If you have the power to have me marry Emma Stone, George Washington, or Hugh Jackman, I will name all of my future children after you.  Kinda like the Foreman family...

They're all named George or Georgette.  Look it up, I dare you.
[via vanity]

Until next time, kiddos!